Do good black fathers exist?

[Mahogany Momma]

I just had a really great brainstorming session with Lamar, creator of the Black and Married with Kids blog which he co-writes with his wife Ronnie. We talked about alot of things, but one of the most important was acknowledging the existance of good black fathers. Lamar is one, my hubby is one, I'm sure all the single dads on the Black Moms Club and husbands of happy black wives are one too!

With that thought in mind I wanted to give you guys the opportunity to download an issue from my Mahogany Momma Magazine called Proud Poppas, click here to download.

Let's acknowledge the proud poppas today, can we do that?

Related Topic: Why is it so hard for black women to talk about FATHERS, but so eas...

Related Topic: Daddy

Related Topic: My Man, My Daddy

Related Topic: Learning How to Deal with Black Men Helped me find the right Black ....

Related Topic: What's wrong with half siblings and baby daddies?

Recommended Reading
Sometimes Rhythm, Sometimes Blues: Young African Americans on Love, Relationships, Sex, and the Search for Mr. Right
Today’s women expect it all: a successful career, an understanding and equally successful mate, and children—all wrapped up in a white picket fence. But recent studies show that while black women have ascended to form a new middle class and have attained success in the business sector, black men haven’t followed suit. Perhaps as a result, with other sociological and economic factors at play, many successful sistahs are having trouble finding a partner to call their own. Sometimes Rhythm, Sometimes Blues is a groundbreaking anthology that explores the many reasons why—analyzing materialism and financial expectations, single motherhood, bling-bling culture, media representations of African-American gender roles, missing fathers, incarcerated partners, and more—and offers hope from women who have beaten the odds. Writers including Kevin Powell and Victor LaValle weigh in on the men’s side in a “Talking Back” section, while female contributors include Kiini Ibura Asalaam, Shawn E. Rhea, Shani O’Neal, and Asha Bandele.
Brought to you by lhenry : The Black Moms Club

[Darrylon Evans]

I truly do believe that good Black fathers do exist. I'm married to one! My husband is not perfect but he is an excellent father and husband. We are a team, and we believe that we lift each other up and we work towards the same goals for our four children. My husband is comfortable in his skin and so am I. What does that mean? He isn't afraid to take turns with me in cleaning the apartment, doing laundry, cooking; I am not afraid of doing "manly" things if he may be helping the children with homework or if he's at the gym. He handles my load when I'm at the gym as well. Teamwork, commitment, and dedication to your family is the recipe for success. A man will give you back what you give him most of the time. Good Black fathers really do exist!

[Tikeshia W]

I want to throw my husband in the good black fathers list. He is my children' step father but dont tell him that. He teaches, discuss, disciplines, loves , and respect the children. He would die for them and he supports me in raising them. We want to raise OUR children to be God fearing, self especting, independant, and well rounded children who learns from thier mistakes instead of never making them. So when the question about good lack men come up I think of my hubby.

[tata]

I love what you said, " it comes by way of trial and error, patience, love and a whole lot of respect". My father was not a father and my mother raised me to believe that men were not to be trusted, not to be relied on for anything. I think this is a problem for many young black women today. Because we've been taught never to rely on a man, we feel we don't need a man, even after we've had children. With that attitude, it's hard to work through the normal problems relationships experience. In my own experience, control issues caused me to leave my children's father, only to find that he was the best man for me and more importantly, our children. He's a wonderful father. It leaves me in awe to see how much our children admire and respect him. Had I had patience, had I understood that we truly do need him, not just his money, I would have saved myself alot of trouble. I'm thankful he had the patience love and respect required to make our relationship work. I learned the hard way, but today I give him all the love and respect he deserves, because I know the grass is not greener on the other side.

[Yasmeen Hayes-Cauthen]

Undoubtedly yes in fact I know two my husband and brother.

Both are wonderful fathers. Who love their sons and wives unconditionally. My son and nephew are bless to have such wonderful, strong and nurturing men in their lives. I truly enjoy watching them with their sons and appreciate how seriously they take their roles as fathers. Neither one are perfect but they both strive everyday to be the best fathers they can be.


I also Although it saddens me that we have to pose this question it is wonderful to be able to celebrate Black fatherhood.

Yaz Cauthen

[Tray]

There are good black fathers. I know some father who are better parents than the mothers.

[nefferteareya f. zagony]

yes,they exist. the problem is that they are not around. i feel that some are just not financially capable of supporting their children. in some instances the fathers are in jail. many are on the DL,or have given up on black women and their children altogether.
there are a few good ones who are in the kids' lives, are doing the right them financially, and they have active roles in the lives of their sons and daughters. what's sad is that there isn't too many. 70% of black households are headed by single,black moms. this is a sad reality. black men definately need to step it up,but the one's that are there for their children have my deepest respect.

[Tina]

Yes, great black fathers exist. Unfortunately, they are not the focus. We would rather focus on the negative in our black men. My husband is a great father who decided when he was young that he would not make the same mistakes his father made. He would be a better man. He has proven that just because you grow up without your father, you don't have to follow in his footsteps. He has been there is all ways for our son who was recently named one of the National Achievement Scholars. Both he and my son are wonderful black men. We together raised our son to be a productive man in society. My son recently thank us for his upbringing and for all of our sacrifices to give him the best that would could. I challenge every mother and father out there to give your son your best and I promise that you will began to see the tides turn for our black men. Let's lift them up and not continue to tear them down.

[Tikeshia W]

I 2nd what Tina said well put

[Londa]

Of course black fathers exist.My boyfriend is a wonderful father to his children.He comes from a family of good black men that take care of their children. I agree with those of you that said it is sad that this question has to be asked, but unfortunately there is so many dead beat fathers out there (white men included) that the good men in this world get over shadowed

[Angie]

There are so many good black fathers out there who exist. I happen to have one. Because he was one, my brothers are now good fathers. I am the mother of a beautiful teenage daughter. Her father and I are not together anymore but he is truly a good father. I couldn't ask for a better man to be a father to my child. I also have males who aren't fathers yet but can't wait for the opportunity to be one once they've taken those sacred marriage vows. I thank God for all of the wonderful fathers who have and will step up to the plate when it comes to raising their kids and who put forth the effort of doing their best when it comes to taking care of their families.

[garryblanson]

Well,it depends on the definition,perception,and interpretation.
Personally,I know that there are many good " Black Fathers."
However,it's based on my own qualifications and expectations.
I believe that most good " Black Fathers " are overlooked
because we don't come packaged as one would expect.
We are adapting with the changing times.We are learning
how to reprogram our thinking to better understand our wives
and the mothers of our children,We are learning ways of
teaching our children how to rise above their circumstances.
We have remained and are active in our childrens lives.We
make mistakes,but we don't use them as excuses.
So,you see, there are good " Black Fathers."
It's just that people tend to remember and talk about the bad
fathers,ratherthan focus on or talk about the good " Black Fathers."
You may of have had 6 good things happen to you yesterday.
However,the first thing you mentioned to someone was that one
" bad thing." -- my point exactly!

[Nicholle]

Absolutely!

My cousins and uncles on my moms side are ALL great dads.

Some of them are divorced or never married to their children's mothers, but they still visit them, take groceries by, get them to and from events and show up at family gatherings. And this is across multiple generations.

As a matter of fact, I will be networking with them at this years family reunion to see if they have any friends for me to date!

Plus my dad is a great father. He just recently came down to Texas to take care of my sons while I attended an academic conference. He is pretty much the father figure for my sons, even though he is their grandfather.